I’ll never forget sitting next to my mom, just hours after she passed. The room was quiet.
We’d always been close. As I sat there, the weight of her absence hit me hard. I started to cry… the kind of crying that takes over your whole body. It surprised me, how much was in there.
And then, something shifted.
The more I let myself feel the loss, the closer I felt to her. Like the tears were keeping us connected.
That moment did something to me.
It took away my fear of feeling hard emotions.
Even though I was completely wrecked, there was a deep sense that I was going to be okay. Not because I felt strong, but because I wasn’t hiding from what was real.
When I think back, it reminds me of standing on a high dive as a kid. Scared you won’t survive the fall, but knowing that the water is going to catch you.
After that, emotions like grief, anger, or regret felt less threatening. They’re still hard, of course… but I know now that I don’t need to run from them.
Once I stopped avoiding those feelings, I noticed something else: I’d been stuck. In more ways than I realized.
- I was stuck in a job that didn’t fit anymore.
- Stuck in a relationship that needed to grow.
- Stuck in a story that said I couldn’t handle emotional pain.
That moment beside my mom didn’t just change how I grieved. It changed how I lived.
The Real Turning Point
That was the turning point. I realized I’d been giving away my power. Not to the emotions themselves, but to the fear of feeling them.
Avoiding them was what had been keeping me stuck.
Once I stopped running from the hard stuff, things started to shift. Within a year, I felt more connected to my work. My relationship got stronger. And that old story I’d been carrying — that I wasn’t built for emotional depth — started to fall away.
That was over a decade ago.
Now, feeling my emotions isn’t something I try to avoid. It’s something I choose to do on purpose! And now, as part of the Alignment Advantage™ framework, I teach leaders how to build emotional resilience and intelligence, and how to use every emotion to their advantage.
The result?
- They lead with more clarity and authenticity.
- They prevent burnout and stagnation before it sets in.
- They communicate more effectively.
- They build deeper trust within their teams.
Why Most Leaders Avoid This Work
Leaders are taught many things: how to execute, how to scale, how to inspire. But rarely are they taught how to feel, especially when it comes to emotion under pressure.
Feelings don’t stay siloed though. Suppress them, and they show up somewhere else: in your tone during a tough conversation, in a rash decision made under stress, or in that low-level tension in your chest that never quite goes away.
Here’s what the science says. People with stronger interoceptive awareness — the ability to sense what’s happening inside their body — are better at regulating their emotions, making decisions, and recovering from stress. And that has real consequences for leadership.
In other words: when you lose touch with the physical feedback loop of your body, you lose access to your most reliable data source.
I’ve worked with founders who could read a room in seconds… but couldn’t read their own signals before snapping at someone. I’ve seen leaders push through fatigue for weeks, only to crash hard when they finally stopped.
Emotional resilience isn’t about avoiding pain. It’s about building the capacity to move through it — with presence, clarity, and care. That’s the work. And most people aren’t taught how. But you’re in the right place!
A Grounding Practice to Build Emotional Resilience
Here’s something you can do right now. Simple. Real. No fluff.
- Sit somewhere still. Feet flat on the floor.
- Close your eyes. One deep belly breath in. Long exhale out.
- Ask yourself: What’s the deepest emotion I’m holding right now? No need to fix it. Just notice.
- Locate it: Where in my body do I feel that emotion? Jaw? Chest? Shoulders? Gut?
- Breathe into it for 30 seconds. Let the tension soften. Remind yourself: I will be okay on the other side of this.
- Take a final inhale. Then open your eyes.
- Ask: What clarity is my body offering me? Write it down, if you can.
Do this once a day for the next week. Watch what changes—not just in your mood, but in your decision-making, presence, and leadership.
Ready to Go Deeper?
If you’re a leader—or you support leaders—and you’re noticing signs of burnout, tension, or emotional disconnection…
👉 [Book David for your next leadership retreat]
👉 [Explore keynote topics on Emotional Intelligence + the Alignment Advantage]
